Author Archives: Matthew David Brozik

WHAT IS THE EMOJI FOR FUNERAL BOREDOM?

A Truelogy

Friends and family of the deceased… distinguished members of the staff of Mourning Joe’s House of Burials… persons who stepped in to get out of

WAITING FOR THE ORDER OF PHOENIX

He-Who-Might-Not-Arrive

A country road. A tree. Evening.   Estragon, sitting on a low mound, is trying to take off his boot. He pulls at it with

A MAN GETS ON A BUS AND CRIES 12 TEARS

Seven Brain Teasers

What is the next number in the sequence? 1, 2, 4, 8, __. You are in an anteroom with two doors leading out. Behind one

WE CANNOT REPLACE WATERLOGGED MONEYMAKER

Before You Shake Your Moneymaker

After removing your new Moneymaker from its carton, carton inserts, and polybags, we suggest that you save all packaging materials in case future shipping of

SOULMEAT

Robert’s Rules of Ardor

My name is Robert, and I have a problem. I’m 36 and single with no viable romantic prospects. That’s not my problem, though. That’s more

Robert’s Rules of Ardor